So last week I asked Kiwis and Aussies if people prefer their fairy bread with margarine or butter, crusts on or crusts off, squares vs triangles.
It turns out that I'd stumbled upon one of the great issues of our time.
The Great Fairy Bread Debate of 2025 is still happening. The most interesting revelations culled from VERY FIRM opinions are:
Apparently the fairies cannot enter the bread if you are a complete monster and neglect to cut the bread, leaving all four crusts. Do not do this or fear Great Judgement and potentially tutting. (Much worse than it sounds. You will feel shame.)
Squares are a travesty, unless they are not. A diplomatic suggestion that squares are just two triangles back to back does not work and will be met with great uproar and virtual snorting.
Butter is the Kiwi preference, unless feeding vegans. If one is feeding vegan fairies, one must check the labels of the margarine for non vegan infiltrators. If spotted, one must tut loudly to let them know they've been spotted. (Please see above point.)
If one is feeding their fairies butter, one must get the spreadable kind, otherwise fear the event of Butter Lumps and Torn Bread. There is no coming back from this. You have failed your fairies.
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